My tea′s gone cold, I′m wondering why
I got out of bed at all
the morning rain clouds up my window
and I can′t see at all
And even if I could it′d all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
it reminds me that it′s not so bad
it′s not so bad
My tea′s gone cold, I′m wondering why
I got out of bed at all
the morning rain clouds up my window
and I can′t see at all
And even if I could it′d all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
it reminds me that it′s not so bad
it′s not so bad
Dear Slim, I wrote but you still ain′t callin
I left my cell, my pager,
and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn,
you must not-a got ′em
There probably was a problem
at the post office or somethin
Sometimes I scribble addresses
too sloppy when I jot ′em
but anyways; fuck it, what′s been up?
Man how′s your daughter?
My girlfriend′s pregnant too,
I′m bout to be a father
If I have a daughter,
guess what I′ma call her?
I′ma name her Bonnie
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too I′m sorry
I had a friend kill himself over some bitch
who didn′t want him
I know you probably hear this everyday,
but I′m your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit
that you did with SkamZ
I got a room full of your posters
and your pictures man
I like the shit you did with Ruckus too,
that shit was fat
Anyways, I hope you get this man,
hit me back,
just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Stan
My tea′s gone cold, I′m wondering why
I got out of bed at all
the morning rain clouds up my window
and I can′t see at all
And even if I could it′d all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
it reminds me that it′s not so bad
it′s not so bad
Dear Slim, you still ain′t called or wrote,
I hope you have a chance
I ain′t mad - I just think it′s FUCKED UP
you don′t answer fans
If you didn′t wanna talk to me
outside your concert
you didn′t have to,
but you coulda signed
an autograph for Matthew
That′s my little brother man,
he′s only six years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you,
four hours and you just said, ″No.″
That′s pretty shitty man
you′re like his fuckin idol
He wants to be just like you man,
he likes you more than I do
Sometimes I even cut myself
to see how much it bleeds
It′s like adrenaline,
the pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real,
and I respect you cause you tell it
My girlfriend′s jealous
cause I talk about you 24/7
But she don′t know you like I know you Slim,
no one does
She don′t know what it was like for people
like us growin up
You gotta call me man,
I′ll be the biggest fan you′ll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Stan -- P.S.
We should be together too
My tea′s gone cold, I′m wondering why
I got out of bed at all
the morning rain clouds up my window
and I can′t see at all
And even if I could it′d all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
it reminds me that it′s not so bad
it′s not so bad
Dear Mister-I′m-Too-Good
To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans,
this′ll be the last package
I ever send your ass
It′s been six months and still no word
I don′t deserve itt?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on ′em perfect
So this is my cassette I′m sending you,
I hope you hear it
I′m in the car right now,
I′m doing 90 on the freeway
I love you Slim, we coulda been together,
think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can′t sleep
and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can′t sleep
and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU
and you can′t BREATHE without me
See Slim; Shut up bitch!
I′m tryin to talk!
Hey Slim, that′s my girlfriend
screamin in the trunk
but I didn′t slit her throat, I just tied her up,
see I ain′t like you
cause if she suffocates she′ll suffer more,
and then she′ll die too
Well, gotta go, I′m almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, how′m I supposed
to send this shit out?
Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner
but I just been busy
You said your girlfriend′s pregnant now,
how far along is she?
Look, I′m really flattered
you would call your daughter that
and here′s an autograph for your brother,
I wrote it on the Starter cap
I′m sorry I didn′t see you at the show,
I musta missed you
Don′t think I did that shit intentionally
just to diss you
But what′s this shit you said about you like
to cut your wrists too?
I say that shit just clownin dogg, c′mon
how fucked up is you?
You got some issues Stan,
I think you need some counseling
to help your ass from bouncing off the walls
when you get down some
And what′s this shit about us
meant to be together?
That type of shit′ll make me not
want us to meet each other
I really think you
and your girlfriend need each other
or maybe you just need to treat her better
I hope you get to read this letter,
I just hope it reaches you in time
before you hurt yourself,
I think that you′ll be doin just fine
if you relax a little,
I′m glad I inspire you but Stan
why are you so mad? Try to understand,
that I do want you as a fan
I just don′t want you to do some crazy shit
I seen this one shit on the news
a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Some dude was drunk
and drove his car over a bridge
and had his girlfriend in the trunk,
and she was pregnant with his kid
and in the car they found a tape,
but they didn′t say who it was to
Come to think about,
his name was.. it was you
Damn..

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